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Writer's pictureThe Dutchess

The Concept of Happiness and the Pursuit of the Perfect Brew  


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Happiness. A simple word with a big meaning. The most sought after feeling. We all want it; we all seek it. In our quest for happiness, through our actions or interactions, we are tirelessly searching for the simple and subtle, the other-worldly or the sensational, whatever happiness represents to us.


Just like the perfect blend of tea, happiness too requires a carefully curated blend of ingredients. Ingredients that could be categorised into words, thoughts, desires, and actions, and perhaps the most important ingredient of all, belief. We may be aware of it, or we may not, but our thoughts are the foundation on where our beliefs are built, since what else would a belief be than a though that we keep thinking?

A good blend of tea relies on a good base, and good thoughts are the base of good beliefs. Whether your favourite tea is black, green or an oolong, that is the base you build your tea on, then adding fragrances until you create your perfect mix. Your beliefs about happiness are the base, and your desires, and the actions you take to reach your desires would be comparable to the fragrances.

We are all searching for the perfect recipe for success, or the perfect recipe for happiness and while there may not be such a thing as perfect, it is our beliefs that either hinder us or help us in creating the desired outcome. See, I believe that life is less about finding your happiness than it is about creating it.


As an interior designer, I am aware of the importance of a good concept.  Without a well thought of concept, we can easily stray from the path of creating the best design. Designing our lives begin with a belief that you can make a change, and it starts with a desire to achieve something better than what you currently have.

So, how do we create a good concept? Where do we start? I always believe in the power of a pow-wow. A good mind mapping is like mixing tealeaves in a pot. Just like tea leaves, the creative process of our minds needs sifting and sorting and fine tuning of our desires. Set the intentions and truly bask in them. Create a ritual of mapping out the way to your goals, just as you would create a ritual for a perfect teatime.


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What is it that we believe makes us happy, and most importantly, why do we believe that achieving it, or having it will make us happy? It is rarely the object or the achievement itself that makes us happy, but more the feeling.  Each time a desire is born within me, I feel the excitement of the possibilities and the little voice that whispers “what if”. Despite the fear, this voice is full of hope and curiosity before it translates into determination. The feeling of happiness creeps in long before the achievement or fulfillment of the dreams. Dreaming of writing that book or going on that trip, they all begin with desire followed by excitement, and don’t you agree that there is a fair amount of happiness brewing within that desire?


I also believe that indulging in the feeling of happiness before the manifestation of your desires occur, enhances the entire experience and indeed, creates quicker outcomes.

 I believe it is in us to evolve and to never stop reaching for the next thing, and I believe that the desire and the journey towards fulfilling our dreams can be more satisfactory than the outcome if we allow it to be. From time to time, the inner child in us may ask “are we there yet”, as our patience is  tested, but as any parent knows, entertaining the child through the journey, and even playing “ I spy with my little eye”, will bring the attention back to the present, and even discover new things along the journey, so treat your inner princess and bring your awareness to the “now”.

Rushing through life and hurrying the process deprives us from the moment, the only time that we have access to. I would sincerely encourage you to savour the moment of becoming while you look forward to the results. The journey is in the now, so let it brew and soak in the present.

recipe for happiness, tea with the dutchess

The concept of happiness is not exclusive to the destination or the achievement, it is ever evolving, and newborn desires will create new journeys, so the concept itself is everchanging, so add to the brew of life as you wish, sugar, spice and all things nice.

 In your pursuit of happiness and as the creator of your destiny, never mind the potential pot stirrers and keep your momentum going. The ingredients to life as well as a cup of tea are yours to choose and we all have our favourite blend and rituals, so inhale the aromas that resonate with your soul and remember that happiness lies in the simplest of things, perhaps even in a teapot.



 

For more advice on etiquette, manners, interior design and how to live your life with grace, elegance and poise, read the book  “Tea with the Dutchess: How to do anything with style” by Kate Gawi.

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